I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I have so many feelings about this burrito
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