Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize
