C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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