bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
