While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
