FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
