i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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