"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
