we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
