Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
