nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
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