he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
