I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize