I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
