just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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