I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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