Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
