If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize