Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
