His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
