i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
