We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
she looked like the before picture.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
