When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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