this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
