under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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