Sponge bath it is.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
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