Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
