her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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