arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
