Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I did not marry a roomba.
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