I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Randomize
