He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
