thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize