Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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