I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize