stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
