Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
