A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
