Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
