Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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