Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry beezy1011 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(703): View more from Virginia

Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more

Fav 204 120248 4356
share tweet
(905): View more from Toronto

You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?

(1-905): View more from Toronto

Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.

Fav 30 4154 954
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(903): View more from Texas

Your vagain smells worse when im sober.

(903): View more from Texas

sorry, worng number

Fav 20 1056 4425
share tweet
(207): View more from Maine

Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived

Fav 18 1095 7637
share tweet
(203): View more from Connecticut

There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...

Fav 14 4559 1660
share tweet
(949): View more from California

I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.

Fav 4 3444 1369
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(336): View more from North Carolina

You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.

Fav 4 2539 1663
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(484): View more from Pennsylvania

he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in

Fav 2 719 548
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(813): View more from Florida

My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7

Fav 0 13 18
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT