thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
