2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
