this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Randomize