i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
