just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
