hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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