If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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