I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
