wakey wakey hands off snakey
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
